Okay let me plan for graduation night.

Hopefully mum is nice enough to pay for most of it. Nd hopefully she can get the chalet for us. Ahahahas.

[Edit]

I felt like blogging again. The previous entry wasn't really a nice one. I should blog like a happy doll. As if.

Anw. I just completed my Geography essay homework ! Lol. Boy am I glad. Still got to do my English compre, Emath ws, Physics ppr and Biology ppr. There's an upcoming Physics test on monday and Social Studies mock exams on Tuesday as well. Natalie's got to study or else she'd fail again ): Need motivation.

Did I mention, I saw Casxn at Tampines lvl4 on last friday ? Ahahs. She's still as pretty nd sweet as before. Have been seeing familiar faces around. Even dear girl's favourite person. Hee.

Yesterday was the last day to end the week. Happy 16th birthday to Geraldine ! I wanted to go home nd rest while Jaslyn nd Jayne were in school. But it started to rain heavily, so slacked around Whitesands library alone. Did some magazine reading until everyone was free to meet up at Tampines. Ate at ljs nd had girl talks. Hmm, what else ? Oh. They got their ears pierced. Haha.

Oh yes, GGRs are getting common these days. It's kind of awkward though. Jaslyn thinks so too. HAHA.

Stomach cramps are hell. I don't like it a single bit. Nd it's bad to lend your sister those purple spectacles - though it's cool, when you'll be needing to use it. Rawr.

Ahkor came into my room just now. It seems like I haven't been talking to my siblings for the longest time. Even my parents. Even if mum tried to start conversations with me. Even if my dad's home this afternoon. I did nothing much. Why ? It got me thinking for awhile. Almost teared.

Maybe I've changed myself. To void from my own family. I don't know.

Oh my tian. Getting so emotional these days. Ahhh.

Alright. I shall prepare to go church with Jaslyn soon. Goodbye then.

[/Edit]

herTORMENTED heart
3:32 PM

I'm shakened. But I don't want any sympathy.

That day I went out with my sister to Cityhall, her N6280 got stolen by some pickpocket. Fuck that person. I'd curse him/her to rot.

Went studying for Physics at Macs on Sunday with Jaslyn. Bumped into Stephanie nd Jan, our two classmates. Then we decided to have long walks to downtown nd back to Whitesands again. Ate dinner out with Mum at the community centre, after which we went down to the police station to reports stuff. Rushed through the graduation presentation. For days, I have had lack of sleep. Only mere 2-3 hours consecutively.

I HATE detest Pastoral Care lessons. Mr Tan just had to pick on me that time just because he thougt I was daydreaming. I fucking am not that example girl you said I was ! You got on my nerve. Sheesh. All that made me think back when I didn't want to-.

The Physics mocks was manageable I guess. But I wasn't happy that others were copying answers from one another since no teacher was around during the test. It was quite unfair.

Nd yeah, we 've gotten back our Emath mocks. It was a surprise I failed yet once again with 27/80. It's not like I wanted to. English Prelim orals ? I came in last in class with only 10.5/20. My conversation nd picure discussion are hopeless cases. I didn't expect it to be so horrible. Partly, it's also because we got Ms Thanabal instead. Then today, Mr Tan handed us back our Amath Integration test. I fucking don't know why I can fail so badly. 5/21 ? Ha ha.

Eyes burning nd swelling with tears. It hurts so much. They always ask : Are you okay ? Yes I am OKAY. Who am I kidding. It makes me tired I want to sleep. I tried but got woken by Mrs Lopez. I tried again, yet the tears still trickled down my face while in the bus. It was an awful wet sight.

Yes, I'm down. Such a loser. Cheer up ? What's the use. It doesn't help pull my grades up yanno. I really am not good at studying. I can't keep up in school ! No one could bother much nd really teach me. Food makes me happy. Though not always. Nowdays, I always depend on it instead of doing other foolish stuff.

Btw. My HONGKONG bestie's sweet 16 birthday was on the 26th. Bought her the top we saw tgt, nd the lovely cake. Hope you liked it yes ? Samatha's birthday is today which is the 27th. Didn't have time to get her some snacks so I shared my kitkat. Lol. Went shopping at town yesterday with Agnes, Jaslyn nd Shir to get Geraldine her birthday present. Preeetiful nd sweet just like her. We hope she'll like it !

Another Emath test on Geraldine's birthday, which is tomorrow. Ahahahs. Oh yes, Happy Birthday all July babes nd hunks ! (:

[Edit]

I'm sorry it's al in my head once more. Nd I was reading back on my old blog. Gosh. Natalie why are you so silly ? Anw. Here's a nice song I remembered hearing.

By Brian Mcknight.

Do you ever think about me?
Do you ever cry yourself to sleep?
In the middle of the night when you're awake,
Are you calling out for me?
Do you ever reminisce?
I can't believe in nothing like this
I know it's crazy
How I still can feel your kiss

It's been six months, eight days, twelve hours (2mths, 4 days, 22hrs)
Since you went away
I miss you so much and I don't know what to say
I should be over you
I should know better but it's just not the case
It's been six months, eight days, twelve hours (2mths, 4 days, 22hrs)
Since you went away

Do you ever ask about me?
Do your friends still tell you what to do?
Every time the phone rings,
Do you wish it was me calling you?
Do you still feel the same?
Or has time put out the flame?
I miss you
Is everything okay?

It's hard enough just passing the time
When I can't seem to get you off my mind

And where is the good in goodbye?
Tell me why, tell me why

[/Edit]

herTORMENTED heart
8:39 PM

Finally the weekend now after a long hectic time. I've got much to update. I haven't been blogging due to my lazyness. Silly me.

English mocks last Tuesday, nd the prelim orals on thursday afternoon. I swear both were tough. Either that or it is just me being stupid. Hahas. I'm fortunate that Ms Thanabal did have eye contact with me, nd not just shaking her legs or having her eyes wander at different directions. Though she did prompted me a few times, oh well. HAHAS. Pity the first few though.

We had good Social Studies lessons with video clips in the library, if not for those classmates who were talking so loudly in the room. Moreover, some rude ones could even shout at Mrs Heng when she forgotten to return us our Emath mock pprs. How incorrigible ! I was so shocked.

Anw. I'm SUPER annoyed by you. You're still the same as before nd trust me to believe that I'd think you would change for the better. It was a temporary act. Can't they all see ? Gosh. Backstabbing me behind my back. Bitching about my bestfriend. Cheating on us nd yourself. That's what I detest the most. What's your problem ? What good will you get in return ? You think you're such a bigshot ? What a close friend indeed. All those horrible things you did. Deceiving everyone. Being so unfair. For all this, why won't I get upset nd agitated. You tell me. I should say that you're actually a nice friend we'd known for a long time. But I can admit that sometimes, we just can't stand you. Yes, we.

I'm currently in-charge of re-editing the whole graduation presentation for our class. It's tiring I guess. Two nights before, I forgotten to save the powerpt which was halfway through. Lalas man. I'm 3/4 to finishing now. Just need the songs nd pictures for both the video nd the powerpt. I hope it's not too awful. I'm not artistic you see. Lol. Thnks for all who helped out (:

Hopefully this time round it would be much better ? More pictures of the girls in the class. Then someone wouldn't be so unhappy that her face isn't there. HAHA.

I don't want to waste my efforts. I didn't even have time to study for all the tests. Enough is enough. Oh my tiann. What a hostile entry today. I'm going out with my sister now. Cityhall here I come. Bye.

herTORMENTED heart
5:04 PM

Monday blues. Started out pretty bad I guess. Awoke at 0645am on this day therefore, had to cab down to school so as to not be late, but to no avail. So saddening. Nd OMFG. The fare cost me $9.70 ! My day's allowance gone just like that. Fucking high rates I tell you. Rarrh. Fortunately enough, it was only my first time round for late-coming this semester. I escaped from the stupid spot check too. Lalas.

Next, I forgotten to bring my PE shirt. Ahh. Played ball in my uniform with Jaslyn while the others were in their attire. Then was break time. The food were very much tempting, but I resisted (Oh fine, I didn't have money already). Lessons came nd go. Stayed back for MT Olvl Listening. They were being nice to get me food, but I didn't have anymore appetite. I'd feel bad too. I didn't eat ANYTHING gosh. Read my Pure Chemistry text instead.

It's so confusing. I think I'm down with depression. One moment I'm nice nd all, another moment I vent my anger like a fucktard. At some point of time, I felt like crying. But I don't know why. Tell me ?

I made 1 or 2 mistakes in the exam. The music almost drained me ! I could have fallen asleep throughout the paper. It's the end of MT. We can now concentrate on other subjects. Left for Whitesands with Jaslyn nd Geraldine. Completed the Emath Coordinate Geometry worksheet at the foodcourt. Then, I finally got myself a hamburger from Macs. Sheesh. Walked home with them soon after.

Back home, I gorged myself with food as usual. Had bread with cheese, half a cup of yoghurt, nd supper which mum brought home : Fried rice, Green curry chicken & Fried spicy noodles. Sighs. Weird, ain't it ?

Life's such a bitch. What's the world coming to ? Is anyone experiencing the same things as me ?

herTORMENTED heart
9:07 PM

Remember about the school tie alteration ? Hahaha, so here's a collaboration.

More about school uniforms ? Messed around with sister's. Ehehhehs. It was quite amusing lah. Though I look stupid I know. Goodness.

Met Jaslyn nd Geraldine yesterday afternoon. We were laughing at people in Whitesands ! Lol. Evening came so they went off. Cindy, Chantel, Shir nd I had dinner at Tampines before training down to Cityhall. Time was running out so we cabbed down to VCH. The dance concert went well. Pretty much interesting with the different genres. I especially liked the finale, "Night of the living dolls". Met some familiar faces there, friends, juniors, ex-seniors. She was there as well-.Took pictures nd all with the girls. Here's some of the photos (others will be uploaded in my albums) :

Like my eyes ? I know the effects are cool. Ahahah.

Nd all of us tgt. Kim, Chantel, Shir, Nat, Felchy, Cindy.

Then when it all ended, Shir nd I stayed around the place for awhile before heading back to tampines for dessert. We talked. We ran. We laughed. Times when I felt jealous so very envious of others. Makes me think of the sad past. Gosh, please slap me. By the time I reached home, it was already past 12am.

Hey my dear girl. Look ! Ahahs. Thnks for holding my hand, guiding me along (:

I was so tired this morning, I went late for my tuition yet again. After which Phoebe, Syy nd I settled at Tampines' KFC to do our Emath. Then off to Syy's house, where I attempted to read my Geography text. I've been eating all the while. I'm getting fatter. Nd not only that, my pocket's burnt a huge hole. An new school week is starting again.

Oh yes. This is dedicated to Phoebe ! Haha.

Xie xie ni rang wo chen yong you xin fu de gan jue ;

herTORMENTED heart
11:31 PM

Emath test on Trigonometry nd Quadratic functions. My gosh I thought it was quite alright. Until I found out my answers differ so much from my friends ! This is so dead.

Had Kobayashi at Eastpoint after school, for 2 consecutive days. Eating too many a times can get quite sick. Lol. Yes, we miss the foodcourt in Whitesands. Anw. Ate ice-cream at Macs yesterday. We were thinking for each other, what school we look like we are from, if we were not in SAC. Nd omfg. I don't like mine.

Played the shadow game with Geraldine. Hahah. Then we altered the school tie ahahah. It was kind of obvious we were making fun of one particular school in the neighbourhood. Bahh.

I clicked onto this site. Try it ; DRAW A PIG.

You drew your pig : Toward the middle of the frame, you are a realist. Facing front, you are direct, enjoy playing devil's advocate and neither fear nor avoid discussions. With many details, you are analytical, cautious, and distrustful. With less than 4 legs, you are insecure or living through a period of major change. The size of the ears indicates how good a listener you are. You are a good listener. The length of the tail indicates the quality of your sex life. You have a good sex life.

I've been singing nonsense nd slacking lately. I can't concentrate well on my plans. Sheesh. I haven't even started accordingly. Maybe they should lock this laptop away from me.

Sister wrote "dream on :D" just below my goal, on the whiteboard. Stupid ass.

Today's the dance concert night, La Passion. Gnna meet the girls to go tgt. I'm off.

herTORMENTED heart
8:18 AM

Dad cooked pepper crabs for dinner on Saturday night. Had Emath revision with Cindy on Sunday afternoon till late. Emath mock exams held on Monday afternoon. I gave up 20marks without attempting. It's not my forte. I suppose the effort used for studying has gone down the drain. I can't seem to apply. Anw. A cat came to our house door yesterday past midnight. I was nice enough to give it milk. Rather cute.

Everyday after school curriculum, the usuals would hang out at Whitesands to have dinner tgt. Of course, always the fun. But somehow I realised my time management nd plans aren't very wise.

The day wasn't good to start with. The blister on my finger hurts from writing with too much force. The muscles on my calves are strained from running nd skipping. Mrs Loh came into our class for a talk about our T-scores nd all. To be struggling behind, nd there's a need to catch up or else others would overtake. Her words were too pressurizing. I am afraid. Even Ms Lim added that in order for us to enter for a poly course, a Mathematics must not fail. However, I've gotten E8 nd D7 for my MYE. Do I have any other options ? No.

Pure Chemistry homework was incomplete, so Mrs Teo was upset. I wasn't fully prepared for a test as well. Mrs Teo refused to take into consideration the last question I did before handing up. My fault. Noorain was pulled into the trouble. Apologies. I was on the verge to tear for everything.

Then came afternoon, which meant the MT Olevel orals. I know I'm not very good with my second language, so even just a moderate pass I'd be contented. But seems like I've just burst the bubble of my only hope ? There it goes. Chinese teacher was so right then. My oral is devastating. The question was too random btw. How was it ? It was super good. Too good such that I broke down after finishing. Being prompted every few seconds until they didn't have anything else to help me. Its depressing enough. Too traumatised for words.

I'm a horrible fucking shithead. All this while, I've let my emotions get the better of me.

Kimberly, we must pray hard. Hopefully our written work wouldn't be as awful. Work hard for the other subjects then. Nd cheer up girl. With love.

Mrs Teo, I'm sorry to be such a disappointment.
Mrs Ho, I'm in a state of remorse. Letting you down.

I sometimes feel demoralised by what others say. Maybe I'd want to try to be a loner. Is it possible ? Because I don't think anyone would seriously bother much. I could even skip breaks like I used to, since I need to save badly for birthdays as well as the nearing graduation night. Of which I currently don't have much interest in.

Friends. What bitches. What hypocrites nd backstabbers. Is it so hard to give in just a little ? What's with the jealousy nd anger when a friend does well ? Why must she get all fessed up with me at times ? With such sarcasm. When she do well herself, she can't be bothered about us. I myself can't seem to stand her attitude recently. It's as if she thinks she must have the best of everything, nd we have to abide her rules. It's not her game anw.

To whom-it-may-concern : On the other hand, why not have the courage to tell her off ? You ought to stand for what you think is right.

I don't always enjoy being the middleman because I'd feel threatened nd confused. Effed.

[Edit]

I've planned. I'm trying.

Supposedly we're going to the school's dance concert La Passion this coming Saturday night.

Oh sister got me dark chocolates nd all from Candyempire (: Fucking bitter. My love.
[/Edit]

herTORMENTED heart
9:09 PM

To recap, there's been quite a happening in our school. Carrie Chong came to promote some event on wednesday. She's pretty ! Then on Thursday, Chen Yi, a Taiwanese pop singer, came to perform for the lower secondary level tgt with a 9.33fm dj. Almost the whole class of 4/8 rushed down to the galleria after the school bell rang, to sneak nd watch ! He even waved at us. Ahahas. Rather cute lah. He got a good dressing style. Picture's sort of blurred though.

Went to block85 for dessert before Geraldine finished her tutorials. Ate our homemade noodles from Whitesands later on. She was so near yet so far-.

We ended school at 12pm instead yesterday since the teachers from different schools had an important meeting I suppose. Whitesands' food eateries were all occupied by students ! Noticed that HSC students kept looking at us, it's effing irritating. And there was a madman on the loose. Ahahs. We ate at New York Pizza. It was quite a mess. Jayne nd I shared the New Yorker meal while Jaslyn nd Geraldine each had a Pizza Burger. Very filling nd yummy ! After which we walked home tgt.

Went with Jayne to town. Many students all over orchard. We went to look around Forver21, Topshop etc. Shopping isn't fun when one doesn't have much cash. Loved those flats we spotted. 93bucks ! Who would be nice enough to get me those black ones ? Haha.

Then to Fareast nd Jayne bought her brown beaded necklace while I've gotten this stupid white-with-pink-polka-dots sash, which I find of no use currently. Wth right ? Couldn't match my clothes. A fashion mistake. I actually wanted that butterfly-printed hairband >:( Rarrh. Anw. Met into familiar faces. Kelsey, Nisha, Alexcia, Dirisa, seniors etc. Then to Taka to get her stuffs. Dinner time ! Yet there was too much crowd. We walked back to Wisma then to Cineleisure. Settled for Kobayashi ! A must to go back there again.

Walked around the place. We got freaked out by those movie posters of the Lady in Water. Lol. Trained back. Reached home close to 11pm. Had some spaghetti that brother left for me. Goodness.

[Edit]
I'm bored at home today. Just got up not long ago. Gnna grab some bites. Having no plans currently. I miss going to church. Hur. Oh yes. I have no idea what to get for my friends' birthday gifts. Lalas. Saving schemes got to start yet again.
[/Edit]

herTORMENTED heart
11:09 AM

Back to school. So there wasn't any plans the previous day.

Lessons were pretty much slack. Emath period was so comical. Anw. Had dental checkup with 3 other friends during assembly. It was way interesting. Grotesque manner. The dental nurse had me dirtied my blouse nd flooded the water in my rinsing cup. I was even laughing while spitting out blood. They were all looking at me. Goodness. Funny experiences at the wrong time I suppose. Like, ewwww. HAHA. She didn't polish my teeth as requested. Rarrhs. But they gave us those pink disclosing tablets we wanted.

No curriculum so we went off to Whitesands for lunch. Homemade noodles ! Jaslyn nd Geraldine are two hilarious girls. Lol. Utter embarrassment today lah. Did many silly things nd conversations. Then did our Emath homework as well until late evening. Dad bought home chicken pies while mum had steamed buns for our dinner. So yummy. Ate to my heart's content. Ahahs.

herTORMENTED heart
11:56 PM

I have been tagged !
Tagged : Geraldine (:

INSTRUCTIONS :
1. Do the following WITH complaint.
2. Choose 3 persons to do this after you completed yours.
3. Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say he/she have been tagged.
4. Start your post with "I have been tagged!" then do this.
Favourites :
Favourite Colour : Black Brown White Green Purple Red Pink Silver
Favourite Food : Korean Cuisine & Macs
Favourite Movie : Not sure
Favourite Sport : Cycling, Running & Badminton
Favourite Day of the Week : It depends
Favourite Season : Summer & Autumn
Favourite Ice Cream : Chocolate mint & Green tea
Currents :
Current Mood : Blanked
Current Taste : Sweet (Cold chocolate drink)
Current Clothes : Shirt nd primary school shorts ? Lol
Current Desktop : Nothing
Current Toenail Colour : Washed out pink
Current Time : 1046am
Current Surroundings : Bed table paper tv pooh bag
Current Annoyances : My testimonial & homeworks !
Current Thoughts : What to do ltr
Firsts :
First Best Friend : Janice from kindergarden (Migrated)
First Crush : Brandon, my childhood playmate HAHA
First Movie : Not sure
First Lie : I don't seem to rmb
First Music : Hrm ?
Lasts :
Last Cigarette : I don't smoke but my dad does
Last Drink : Cold chocolate
Last Car Ride : Yesterday
Last Crush : HAHA
Last Movie : I'm outdated
Last Phone Call : Mum
Last CD played : None
Have you ever :
Have you ever dated one of your bestfriend : Shir ?
Have you ever broken the law : Chewing gum's no harm
Have you ever been arrested : Nope
Have you ever skinny-dipped : Nope
Have you ever been on TV : When we supported Sylvester Sim ? That was retarhded. But I ever been on the Newpaper & some video lol
Have you ever kissed someone you dont know : Not sure
Things :
5 things you are wearing : My specs hairband earrings shirt shorts
4 things you done today : Slept talk cook blog
3 things you can hear right now : Television noise outside my room sister talking Itunes playlist.
1 thing you do when you are bored : Eat
People who have been tagged :
1. Anyone who bothers. Hahas.

Dad fetched me to tuition yesterday. After which Syy nd Jaslyn accompanied me to change that Kappa top at Isetan. Syy bought her black striped pumps. Oh we had lunch at the usual foodcourt in Century Sq. Saba fish set nd Kimchi fried rice ! It was good. But Jaslyn nd I got cheated of our money. We had an unchilled big coconut each that cost $3.10. Goodness.

".. and i'm currently watching this variety show on cable. featuring Mike He, or rather, Jiang Meng ! man, he's so comical! he's trying to dance some retro dance now, he can't dance, seriously! HEH. ( NAT, got repeat tmr at 0630 on ch54! ) .."

Omg I so want to watch please ? Thnks Ger btw. Eh fuck. How about the section's outing ? Aye, it's not even confirmed. Hahahah. I have no idea what's going on. Oh my tiann then my sister started to annoy me nd all just now (I think she swings). Anw I just cooked spagetti with her. It's super too much, very filling. Ahahs.

So I've found my current Chinese song on the 1st of July. It was just uploaded on youtube by a kind soul (thnks stranger). I waited the whole night searching for it lah. Lol.

herTORMENTED heart
10:38 AM

Awoke with perspiration nd sore voice. Ate nasi lemak for lunch this afternoon (yes its this crazy even when I'm sick) since parents brought food home. They have no idea I'm not well. Then went out to meet Shir to walkwalk at Bugis. They have this SuperHeroes shop which sells interesting tops nd all. Hahas. While crossing the junction, there were 2 guys (if I'm not wrong) directly behind us who went "Her name's Natalie right ?" "Hahaha" "Or is it Naat-alie ?" Omg my name ? I was scared off I didn't dare look back. Shir was busy talking to me she didn't take notice. Lol.

Anw. Bought a top each. Gnna go back there another time if possible. Took pictures to upload. Nd we took turns wearing my jacket. Laughs. She looks nice too. Ooh. We found our boyfriends. HAHA. Mr handsem(s) situated at Bugis. So lalas.

Our legs were all sore from all the walking. Trained back to Tampines. It was pure coincidence -. Then took a bus ride back to Pasir Ris. Had to buy my own dinner from central. The guys selling me duck rice were very weird but friendly ! They even smiled nd said bye. HAHA. Oh mann. Got myself bubble tea as well. Walked all the way back home at a very slow pace. My foot hurts badly.

I'm certain my flu nd cough will take quite awhile to recover. Sister's in my room nd she turned on the air-conditioner, currently sleeping on my bed. Sheesh. Tommorow's tuition nd all. Monday evening's Haegen Daaz with section I suppose. Yummys.

Shir. Thnks my lovely girl (:

herTORMENTED heart
9:17 PM

It's finally the end of the first school week. We're all already drained so quickly. Moreover, I've taken cab to school twice this time. How waste of money.

Anw. Did running for 2 consecutive days. Sheesh. Then went a little too high on Thursday. Lol. I was laughing nd singing so much nonsense. Something's just not right. Sigh.

Oh. I'm sick btw. Yet no doctor or medicine. Parents doesn't know lah. Not very comfortable breaking into cold sweats at night. Head spinning nd all due to fever, needing tissues all the time. Please don't come near me or you'd catch my flu.

I tried sleeping from 4pm all the way till late night, hoping that I would be okay by then ? But to no avail. Cooked my own dinner : porridge. Then made hot chocolate since cold drinks would not be too good an idea. Still, I'm not getting any better. Gosh. I can't stand it anymore. This feeling's horrible.

Cancelled running with Jayne in evening. Dang. I hope I can make it for Saturday's plans of running nd going out.

I want to find this Chinese song I heard recently. Later sometime perhaps.

herTORMENTED heart
1:58 AM